








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 130 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 79 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
1245 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,193 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1654 | 39% |
| Smokes | 1301 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 545 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 693 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $255,312 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 124 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chung | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | socayoot | 61% | 31 |
| #3 | Aid | 61% | 18 |
| #4 | nmad | 59% | 54 |
| #5 | DoughBoy | 57% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DoughBoy | 237 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #2 | nmad | 171 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | Dark Brandon | 150 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | socayoot | 136 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | Inno Cent | 79 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ mumumumumumumuridesu | +3.60 | 79 | 66 |
| #2 | DoughBoy | +1.98 | 53 | 55 |
| #3 | BigEgg | +1.83 | 79 | 31 |
| #4 | socayoot | +1.00 | 79 | 53 |
| #5 | Thats a spicy meatball | +0.47 | 67 | 49 |





