








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 585 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 492 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 32 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8068 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,167 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5223 | 30% |
| Smokes | 6099 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1319 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 4526 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,392,834 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 526 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | boiled bread | 53% | 78 |
| #2 | barry | 52% | 118 |
| #3 | Crab Linguiner | 51% | 153 |
| #4 | DoughBoy | 51% | 144 |
| #5 | AjaxLegacy | 50% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Aid | 48% | 86 |
| #11 | Mstrav | 47% | 64 |
| #12 | Thats a spicy meatball | 46% | 39 |
| #13 | Dark Brandon | 44% | 169 |
| #14 | Inno Cent | 43% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | socayoot | +3.16 | 82 | 46 |
| #2 | barry | +2.28 | 54 | 75 |
| #3 | DoughBoy | +1.71 | 54 | 54 |
| #4 | nmad | +1.49 | 72 | 75 |
| #5 | Thats a spicy meatball | +0.42 | 73 | 33 |





