








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 52 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 95 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2234 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,865 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 893 | 13% |
| Smokes | 961 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 2848 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 2163 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,138,666 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | t0mN | 36% | 25 |
| #16 | Ann4gy | 33% | 24 |
| #17 | DOPE | 25% | 20 |
| #18 | Miztor | 24% | 29 |
| #19 | Ka1 -iwnl- | 24% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Losy_Golab | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Wunderhorn von Glanziboy | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | Miztor | 3 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | Dangstar | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | sonniibee | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M/\RCËLINHO91 | 672 | 0.29 | 18 min |
| #2 | Wunderhorn von Glanziboy | 288 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #3 | Dangstar | 211 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | Euka | 136 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | Centaur0n | 134 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | High_Kick_Hassan | +3.03 | 88 | 53 |
| #2 | M/\RCËLINHO91 | +2.63 | 86 | 79 |
| #3 | Wunderhorn von Glanziboy | +1.53 | 83 | 71 |
| #4 | Euka | +1.51 | 70 | 67 |
| #5 | Dangstar | +1.09 | 48 | 59 |





