








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 87 matches | ||
| Faceit | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2243 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,610 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1117 | 24% |
| Smokes | 816 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1774 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 903 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $867,378 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Avaar ♡ | 59% | 204 |
| #2 | Moon | 58% | 224 |
| #3 | Neffie | 53% | 260 |
| #4 | eiffeN | 46% | 72 |
| #5 | Bguuuy | 38% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Neffie | 53% | 260 |
| #4 | eiffeN | 46% | 72 |
| #5 | Bguuuy | 38% | 48 |
| #6 | money_1_man | 35% | 20 |
| #7 | ThiccTurtle | 32% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moon | 12 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Neffie | 4 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | ThiccTurtle | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | money_1_man | 2 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | Avaar ♡ | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Avaar ♡ | 558 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| #2 | Neffie | 541 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #3 | Moon | 393 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #4 | eiffeN | 98 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Bguuuy | 44 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moon | +2.95 | 78 | 72 |
| #2 | Neffie | +2.33 | 89 | 69 |
| #3 | Avaar ♡ | +1.33 | 82 | 71 |
| #4 | you did good $lick... | -2.49 | 71 | 41 |
| #5 | Bguuuy | -2.95 | 34 | 40 |





