








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 228 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1476 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,686 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 758 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1335 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 461 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1132 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $559,558 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 105 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maZe. | 82% | 11 |
| #2 | [RVL]éclair15 | 65% | 138 |
| #3 | Fatum GC | 59% | 69 |
| #4 | Jeff Tuche | 56% | 18 |
| #5 | lexoseb36(fr) | 53% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | lexoseb36(fr) | 53% | 68 |
| #6 | < Jox > | 52% | 25 |
| #7 | CabilCouille o_O | 51% | 35 |
| #8 | StawKk 🦢 | 50% | 38 |
| #9 | Persephone | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [RVL]éclair15 | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | StawKk 🦢 | 4 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | CabilCouille o_O | 4 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | Fatum GC | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | lexoseb36(fr) | 2 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fatum GC | 334 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #2 | lexoseb36(fr) | 177 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | StawKk 🦢 | 137 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | [RVL]éclair15 | 116 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | CabilCouille o_O | 64 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [RVL]éclair15 | +2.80 | 60 | 45 |
| #2 | StawKk 🦢 | +2.26 | 79 | 57 |
| #3 | maZe. | +1.82 | 54 | 68 |
| #4 | La Belle Couille | +1.72 | 70 | 41 |
| #5 | < Jox > | +0.41 | 60 | 63 |





