








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 659 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 285 matches | ||
| Faceit | 285 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6664 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,202 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6464 | 24% |
| Smokes | 7286 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 7718 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 5734 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,218,383 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 346 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shorty | 54% | 202 |
| #2 | kdL ' | 53% | 609 |
| #3 | XiLence | 52% | 563 |
| #4 | PaddyS | 52% | 592 |
| #5 | mrv1n. | 49% | 374 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shorty | 54% | 202 |
| #2 | kdL ' | 53% | 609 |
| #3 | XiLence | 52% | 563 |
| #4 | PaddyS | 52% | 592 |
| #5 | mrv1n. | 49% | 374 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kdL ' | 17 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | PaddyS | 14 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | XiLence | 12 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | mrv1n. | 6 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Shorty | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PaddyS | 3158 | 0.25 | 82 min |
| #2 | kdL ' | 2917 | 0.23 | 82 min |
| #3 | XiLence | 1604 | 0.13 | 41 min |
| #4 | mrv1n. | 831 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #5 | Shorty | 262 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XiLence | +3.57 | 79 | 73 |
| #2 | automat1kk | +0.24 | 68 | 74 |
| #3 | kdL ' | +0.23 | 64 | 78 |
| #4 | PaddyS | -0.66 | 64 | 71 |
| #5 | Shorty | -1.18 | 69 | 56 |





