








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 109 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 188 matches | ||
| Faceit | 165 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2873 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,000 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3892 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4108 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3792 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4208 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,001,899 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 99 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XiLence | 49% | 359 |
| #2 | automat1kk | 49% | 374 |
| #3 | kdL ' | 49% | 417 |
| #4 | PaddyS | 48% | 385 |
| #5 | Shorty | 46% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XiLence | 49% | 359 |
| #2 | automat1kk | 49% | 374 |
| #3 | kdL ' | 49% | 417 |
| #4 | PaddyS | 48% | 385 |
| #5 | Shorty | 46% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kdL ' | 11 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | automat1kk | 9 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | XiLence | 7 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | PaddyS | 6 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Shorty | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PaddyS | 2088 | 0.25 | 53 min |
| #2 | kdL ' | 2000 | 0.23 | 58 min |
| #3 | automat1kk | 1077 | 0.14 | 31 min |
| #4 | XiLence | 998 | 0.13 | 25 min |
| #5 | Shorty | 55 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XiLence | +3.71 | 80 | 73 |
| #2 | kdL ' | +0.74 | 67 | 78 |
| #3 | automat1kk | +0.08 | 66 | 76 |
| #4 | PaddyS | -0.64 | 66 | 71 |
| #5 | Shorty | -0.81 | 74 | 56 |





