








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 172 matches | ||
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4460 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,671 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2734 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2288 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2517 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1132 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $888,786 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | panzer | 60% | 35 |
| #2 | Nozza | 58% | 24 |
| #3 | ''Zodiak. | 56% | 25 |
| #4 | 80HD Jacker | 56% | 25 |
| #5 | very angry man | 55% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Catfish Billy | 9 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | doH! | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Яevealz | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | EsO* | 5 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Wolvie | 5 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Monkey D. Luffy | +3.41 | 72 | 61 |
| #2 | atheoo | +2.61 | 63 | 61 |
| #3 | Wolvie | +1.91 | 66 | 63 |
| #4 | DAN | +0.73 | 42 | 73 |
| #5 | panzer | +0.69 | 55 | 55 |





