








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 69 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Faceit | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2394 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,037 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2529 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2324 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1381 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1803 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $486,911 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vypp | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | mOgens | 64% | 28 |
| #3 | kanebazo | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | nutson | 62% | 37 |
| #5 | Jimmy | 62% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Dansson | 54% | 68 |
| #11 | gugga03 | 53% | 51 |
| #12 | ✪ Leifssson™ | 50% | 40 |
| #13 | T1 | 49% | 37 |
| #14 | Lundin | 46% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dansson | 6 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | vypp | 2 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | gugga03 | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | mOgens | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | T1 | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gugga03 | 167 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | Jimmy | 158 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #3 | Nosakaツ 30hz | 140 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #4 | Dansson | 108 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | mOgens | 100 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mOgens | +3.50 | 86 | 70 |
| #2 | Jimmy | +2.53 | 87 | 67 |
| #3 | Jamin Linduson Zhang | +1.86 | 63 | 74 |
| #4 | kanebazo | +1.81 | 67 | 71 |
| #5 | vypp | +1.79 | 85 | 68 |





