










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 323 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1282 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,457 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2660 | 41% |
| Smokes | 1657 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 829 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1311 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $530,417 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Lilyll | 43% | 14 |
| #7 | Haru Urara | 43% | 14 |
| #8 | Zyphore | 40% | 58 |
| #9 | Phanndesal | 37% | 60 |
| #10 | bot Alberattte | 36% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kexrus | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Jimster9015 | 7 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | Zyphore | 6 | 0.0046 |
| #4 | bot Alberattte | 4 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | Phanndesal | 3 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kexrus | 215 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | kururu | 161 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | Zyphore | 148 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | qish | 145 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #5 | Haru Urara | 89 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kururu | +3.04 | 66 | 44 |
| #2 | Kexrus | +1.53 | 62 | 55 |
| #3 | qish | +1.49 | 45 | 59 |
| #4 | Zyphore | +0.54 | 37 | 44 |
| #5 | Jimster9015 | -0.45 | 44 | 24 |





