








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 197 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1112 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,332 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 611 | 26% |
| Smokes | 884 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 364 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 473 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $683,634 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Haru Urara | 60% | 10 |
| #2 | Phanndesal | 44% | 64 |
| #3 | Kexrus | 44% | 62 |
| #4 | Zyphore | 43% | 46 |
| #5 | kururu | 40% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phanndesal | 5 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | kiiyo | 5 | 0.0102 |
| #3 | Kexrus | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Zyphore | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | Sneeze | 4 | 0.0054 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sneeze | 221 | 0.30 | 6 min |
| #2 | Kexrus | 138 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | kururu | 130 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | qish | 129 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | Zyphore | 99 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kururu | +3.05 | 68 | 41 |
| #2 | Haru Urara | +2.98 | 36 | 66 |
| #3 | Kexrus | +1.60 | 64 | 51 |
| #4 | Zyphore | +1.38 | 37 | 45 |
| #5 | qish | +0.87 | 45 | 57 |





