








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1241 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 652 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 125 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 191 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8311 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,447 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9780 | 27% |
| Smokes | 8213 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 10248 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 8206 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,968,227 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 876 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kry | 57% | 75 |
| #2 | babidi | 51% | 325 |
| #3 | J1mple | 51% | 183 |
| #4 | Bob der Baumeister | 50% | 599 |
| #5 | fyre | 50% | 119 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Bob der Baumeister | 50% | 599 |
| #5 | fyre | 50% | 119 |
| #6 | Elias M'Bierek | 49% | 53 |
| #7 | Mordock | 49% | 190 |
| #8 | Treffnicht0 | 42% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J1mple | 22 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | kry | 15 | 0.0095 |
| #3 | Mordock | 14 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | Bob der Baumeister | 4 | 0.0003 |
| #5 | Elias M'Bierek | 3 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bob der Baumeister | 2316 | 0.17 | 65 min |
| #2 | babidi | 2061 | 0.28 | 56 min |
| #3 | kry | 266 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #4 | Mordock | 265 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #5 | fyre | 229 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kry | +2.86 | 84 | 66 |
| #2 | fyre | +0.99 | 68 | 60 |
| #3 | babidi | +0.62 | 50 | 74 |
| #4 | Nils H | +0.22 | 52 | 73 |
| #5 | Mordock | +0.20 | 34 | 57 |





