








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 262 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 134 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1561 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,104 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3159 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2021 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2721 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2203 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $220,729 of utility $52 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 730 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doogle | 59% | 63 |
| #2 | FYIDream | 46% | 13 |
| #3 | MCZS | 46% | 152 |
| #4 | zLukaH_ | 45% | 53 |
| #5 | jakeit | 45% | 159 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | MCZS | 46% | 152 |
| #4 | zLukaH_ | 45% | 53 |
| #5 | jakeit | 45% | 159 |
| #6 | ChriL | 43% | 109 |
| #7 | condor † 3:16 | 41% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jakeit | 8 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | MCZS | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Doogle | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | ChriL | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | condor † 3:16 | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChriL | 452 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #2 | MCZS | 204 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | Doogle | 127 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | jakeit | 76 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | zLukaH_ | 61 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MCZS | +1.61 | 59 | 55 |
| #2 | Doogle | +1.61 | 63 | 62 |
| #3 | jakeit | -0.11 | 46 | 39 |
| #4 | zLukaH_ | -0.52 | 56 | 46 |
| #5 | FYIDream | -0.67 | 56 | 51 |





