








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 613 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 396 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4278 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,392 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 755 | 12% |
| Smokes | 1726 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2206 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 1705 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,069,864 of utility $309 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 967 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doogle | 50% | 150 |
| #2 | zLukaH_ | 49% | 157 |
| #3 | MCZS | 48% | 289 |
| #4 | ChriL | 46% | 254 |
| #5 | HotRodTyler | 45% | 159 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | MCZS | 48% | 289 |
| #4 | ChriL | 46% | 254 |
| #5 | HotRodTyler | 45% | 159 |
| #6 | condor † 3:16 | 43% | 245 |
| #7 | FYIDream | 42% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MCZS | 14 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | ChriL | 8 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Doogle | 8 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | condor † 3:16 | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | HotRodTyler | 4 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChriL | 1077 | 0.20 | 26 min |
| #2 | HotRodTyler | 803 | 0.23 | 20 min |
| #3 | MCZS | 335 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| #4 | Doogle | 287 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #5 | zLukaH_ | 180 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MCZS | +1.94 | 63 | 55 |
| #2 | Doogle | +1.59 | 68 | 61 |
| #3 | jakeit | -0.12 | 47 | 39 |
| #4 | zLukaH_ | -0.58 | 59 | 49 |
| #5 | HotRodTyler | -0.95 | 52 | 65 |





