








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 265 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 281 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2482 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,209 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 980 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1912 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1828 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1489 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $657,668 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 286 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doogle | 45% | 47 |
| #2 | ChriL | 44% | 201 |
| #3 | MCZS | 44% | 200 |
| #4 | zLukaH_ | 43% | 92 |
| #5 | jakeit | 43% | 245 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | MCZS | 44% | 200 |
| #4 | zLukaH_ | 43% | 92 |
| #5 | jakeit | 43% | 245 |
| #6 | HotRodTyler | 41% | 99 |
| #7 | FYIDream | 40% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MCZS | 11 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | ChriL | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | jakeit | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Doogle | 3 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | HotRodTyler | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChriL | 868 | 0.20 | 21 min |
| #2 | HotRodTyler | 469 | 0.22 | 12 min |
| #3 | MCZS | 198 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | jakeit | 125 | 0.02 | 4 min |
| #5 | zLukaH_ | 114 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MCZS | +1.82 | 65 | 52 |
| #2 | Doogle | +0.85 | 70 | 62 |
| #3 | jakeit | -0.14 | 49 | 39 |
| #4 | zLukaH_ | -0.29 | 58 | 47 |
| #5 | HotRodTyler | -0.51 | 52 | 67 |





