








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 561 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 63 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1850 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,716 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2293 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1715 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1477 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1231 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $466,104 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 243 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nokian saapas | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | ropanz | 61% | 41 |
| #3 | Verklagen | 60% | 15 |
| #4 | Verklagen | 57% | 21 |
| #5 | SYÖ LEIPÄÄ | 56% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Luka | 53% | 145 |
| #8 | h3lppo | 50% | 12 |
| #9 | N1ksutin | 50% | 52 |
| #10 | Aleksi "allu" Jalli | 48% | 96 |
| #11 | Röpö Roope | 39% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aleksi "allu" Jalli | 21 | 0.0106 |
| #2 | Luka | 14 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | SYÖ LEIPÄÄ | 13 | 0.0097 |
| #4 | deata | 12 | 0.0146 |
| #5 | ropanz | 7 | 0.0080 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luka | 261 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #2 | Aleksi "allu" Jalli | 219 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | ropanz | 173 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #4 | deata | 136 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | SYÖ LEIPÄÄ | 103 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nokian saapas | +7.26 | 100 | 48 |
| #2 | Verklagen | +3.33 | 57 | 38 |
| #3 | deata | +2.57 | 65 | 50 |
| #4 | h3lppo | +0.38 | 60 | 26 |
| #5 | ● ᴥ ● | +0.22 | 46 | 59 |





