








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 506 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 322 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4804 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,824 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4626 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4050 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2923 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3225 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,426,997 of utility $201 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 196 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anony | 83% | 115 |
| #2 | 1001 | 81% | 42 |
| #3 | AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA | 80% | 40 |
| #4 | estefano | 79% | 33 |
| #5 | ヤマ <畑木山> ヤマ | 78% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AumMaloDy2K | 18 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Anony | 13 | 0.0058 |
| #3 | BoonRywin | 11 | 0.0102 |
| #4 | P.K | 9 | 0.0087 |
| #5 | Kjwowww | 7 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AumMaloDy2K | 565 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #2 | Anony | 319 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | tr0opmonster | 313 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #4 | BASHBOY | 277 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #5 | ᴘ.ᴅᴜɢᴏʀ | 259 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tr0opmonster | +5.12 | 93 | 61 |
| #2 | ヤマ <畑木山> ヤマ | +4.27 | 91 | 52 |
| #3 | AumMaloDy2K | +3.95 | 90 | 62 |
| #4 | Anony | +3.88 | 93 | 51 |
| #5 | BASHBOY | +3.69 | 87 | 64 |





