








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 410 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 229 matches | ||
| Faceit | 183 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 111 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4033 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,999 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8367 | 32% |
| Smokes | 8396 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 4260 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 4976 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,516,562 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 128 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mka | 74% | 38 |
| #2 | ITACHI ZAZA | 70% | 30 |
| #3 | Jake | 68% | 47 |
| #4 | L1TTLE | 67% | 36 |
| #5 | [Priminity] Vace | 66% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PauLekiNn | 11 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | Cube | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | frizzyB | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | cL | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | ITACHI ZAZA | 3 | 0.0046 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PauLekiNn | 1822 | 0.23 | 48 min |
| #2 | Cube | 451 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #3 | frizzyB | 352 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #4 | mka | 199 | 0.28 | 5 min |
| #5 | testiculuscobolorum | 155 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [Priminity] Vace | +2.59 | 67 | 54 |
| #2 | cL | +2.10 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | Cube | +1.84 | 75 | 66 |
| #4 | ITACHI ZAZA | +1.47 | 73 | 61 |
| #5 | mka | +1.03 | 70 | 84 |





