








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 147 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 60 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1422 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,904 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1139 | 29% |
| Smokes | 887 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 912 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 966 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $355,471 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ JWalker ♥ | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | HKR | 67% | 6 |
| #3 | Eiki-47 | 63% | 16 |
| #4 | Aron Olafs*** | 56% | 9 |
| #5 | Aprikosa | 54% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Dónakarl | 43% | 7 |
| #13 | Skambo | 40% | 10 |
| #14 | BaraSara | 39% | 28 |
| #15 | steezy squeezy | 36% | 14 |
| #16 | Klemmiii | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vikki | 7 | 0.0123 |
| #2 | steezy squeezy | 1 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Klemmiii | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☭ shineN4t [exp] | 92 | 0.34 | 3 min |
| #2 | Aprikosa | 87 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | BaraSara | 54 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | LeXmaskinen | 31 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Dónakarl | 30 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dónakarl | +2.01 | 61 | 61 |
| #2 | Vikki | +1.65 | 84 | 56 |
| #3 | Aron Olafs*** | +1.53 | 74 | 75 |
| #4 | yungArk17ekt | +1.43 | 85 | 61 |
| #5 | ♥ JWalker ♥ | +1.20 | 64 | 66 |





