








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 281 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1583 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,292 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1512 | 46% |
| Smokes | 567 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 770 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 443 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $490,379 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 109 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lexon | 73% | 15 |
| #2 | zundo | 64% | 14 |
| #3 | ✪ Jerry (off a perc30) | 62% | 13 |
| #4 | Smegz | 61% | 28 |
| #5 | reflexx | 49% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Smegz | 61% | 28 |
| #5 | reflexx | 49% | 98 |
| #6 | ✪ George | 40% | 10 |
| #7 | xsv- | 30% | 10 |
| #8 | Brm | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | reflexx | 56 | 0.0296 |
| #2 | Smegz | 5 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | ✪ George | 5 | 0.0270 |
| #4 | zundo | 2 | 0.0095 |
| #5 | Lexon | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | reflexx | 406 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #2 | Smegz | 58 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Lexon | 50 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #4 | ✪ Jerry (off a perc30) | 47 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #5 | zundo | 33 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zundo | +4.45 | 83 | 60 |
| #2 | Lexon | +3.34 | 89 | 60 |
| #3 | ✪ Jerry (off a perc30) | +1.80 | 79 | 73 |
| #4 | Smegz | +1.52 | 85 | 71 |
| #5 | reflexx | +0.86 | 79 | 68 |





