








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1024 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 529 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8727 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,665 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9867 | 28% |
| Smokes | 8545 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 7605 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 9648 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,453,112 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 656 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | saffe | 63% | 224 |
| #2 | waves | 56% | 59 |
| #3 | Bot_Trax | 55% | 155 |
| #4 | CAMMA | 53% | 86 |
| #5 | Thandi | 53% | 168 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Bot_Trax | 55% | 155 |
| #4 | CAMMA | 53% | 86 |
| #5 | Thandi | 53% | 168 |
| #6 | Iron | 52% | 136 |
| #7 | blah | 51% | 463 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | blah | 19 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | waves | 14 | 0.0116 |
| #3 | Bot_Trax | 11 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | CAMMA | 8 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | Thandi | 7 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | blah | 1848 | 0.19 | 58 min |
| #2 | Thandi | 654 | 0.19 | 19 min |
| #3 | Bot_Trax | 548 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #4 | saffe | 519 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #5 | Iron | 240 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bot_Trax | +1.59 | 75 | 67 |
| #2 | saffe | +1.29 | 52 | 76 |
| #3 | waves | +1.03 | 74 | 43 |
| #4 | Stoney | +0.64 | 62 | 71 |
| #5 | blah | -0.19 | 76 | 73 |





