








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1192 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 637 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7466 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,430 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10014 | 31% |
| Smokes | 9864 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 6885 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5667 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,164,634 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1547 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | saffe | 63% | 111 |
| #2 | waves | 51% | 45 |
| #3 | CAMMA | 51% | 61 |
| #4 | Stoney | 51% | 463 |
| #5 | Bot_Trax | 51% | 160 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | CAMMA | 51% | 61 |
| #4 | Stoney | 51% | 463 |
| #5 | Bot_Trax | 51% | 160 |
| #6 | Iron | 50% | 100 |
| #7 | Thandi | 48% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stoney | 26 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Bot_Trax | 9 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | waves | 7 | 0.0081 |
| #4 | Thandi | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Iron | 6 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stoney | 1740 | 0.18 | 47 min |
| #2 | Bot_Trax | 557 | 0.17 | 15 min |
| #3 | Thandi | 527 | 0.18 | 16 min |
| #4 | saffe | 265 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #5 | Iron | 159 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | saffe | +1.25 | 53 | 74 |
| #2 | Bot_Trax | +0.91 | 75 | 66 |
| #3 | waves | +0.56 | 74 | 47 |
| #4 | Stoney | +0.34 | 60 | 71 |
| #5 | blah | -0.21 | 76 | 73 |





