








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 191 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 109 matches | ||
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 375 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3361 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,264 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4640 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2739 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 3354 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3531 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $947,569 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 528 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BONESAW | 54% | 103 |
| #2 | VB | 53% | 38 |
| #3 | Aintisam | 52% | 23 |
| #4 | the machine | 49% | 381 |
| #5 | Joker8D | 48% | 170 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the machine | 2093 | 0.27 | 67 min |
| #2 | Joker8D | 161 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #3 | BONESAW | 125 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | Aintisam | 35 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | WaiYuChiTing | 15 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the machine | +2.39 | 59 | 63 |
| #2 | Aintisam | +1.92 | 42 | 73 |
| #3 | BONESAW | +0.91 | 50 | 57 |
| #4 | Miles Morales | +0.27 | 57 | 61 |
| #5 | Joker8D | +0.13 | 53 | 46 |





