








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 46 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1540 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,884 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 793 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1738 | 45% |
| HE Grenades | 1049 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 304 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $437,894 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 33 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Proud | 83% | 18 |
| #2 | pogo | 55% | 85 |
| #3 | the ball formulator | 55% | 194 |
| #4 | quando rondo | 54% | 114 |
| #5 | Aman18 | 52% | 159 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | the ball formulator | 55% | 194 |
| #4 | quando rondo | 54% | 114 |
| #5 | Aman18 | 52% | 159 |
| #6 | Ahreeeeee | 49% | 166 |
| #7 | Generalpiggle | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the ball formulator | 15 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | quando rondo | 10 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | Ahreeeeee | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Aman18 | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | pogo | 6 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ahreeeeee | 443 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #2 | the ball formulator | 329 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #3 | quando rondo | 194 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | pogo | 177 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | Aman18 | 73 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | the ball formulator | +5.18 | 89 | 55 |
| #2 | quando rondo | +3.41 | 82 | 58 |
| #3 | acai | -1.51 | 67 | 39 |
| #4 | Ahreeeeee | -1.57 | 58 | 48 |
| #5 | Aman18 | -2.07 | 56 | 32 |





