








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 872 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 569 matches | ||
| Faceit | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




72 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9356 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,939 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11417 | 36% |
| Smokes | 8141 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2404 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 9977 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,974,869 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 512 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pathetic Jon | 74% | 114 |
| #2 | 7am | 74% | 106 |
| #3 | Sunny | 73% | 67 |
| #4 | Kronen | 72% | 54 |
| #5 | Twistzz | 67% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | aaa | 59% | 79 |
| #10 | Wayha | 59% | 49 |
| #11 | Cryptic | 57% | 68 |
| #12 | Pontic | 56% | 102 |
| #13 | Tsamina mina | 55% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dan | 15 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | legacy | 11 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | Pathetic Jon | 9 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Kronen | 8 | 0.0068 |
| #5 | Logs | 7 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dan | 1543 | 0.24 | 46 min |
| #2 | Tsamina mina | 556 | 0.33 | 14 min |
| #3 | legacy | 502 | 0.17 | 12 min |
| #4 | Pontic | 460 | 0.21 | 10 min |
| #5 | Pathetic Jon | 459 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dan | +3.49 | 83 | 71 |
| #2 | 7am | +3.20 | 85 | 67 |
| #3 | Pathetic Jon | +2.98 | 76 | 69 |
| #4 | Twistzz | +2.49 | 85 | 58 |
| #5 | Cryptic | +2.31 | 90 | 65 |





