








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2383 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 250 matches | 2,271 | |
| Premier | 128 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 80 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6412 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,117 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3294 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4103 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4962 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 4758 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,066,578 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1639 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | L1meXX | 74% | 27 |
| #2 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | 61% | 74 |
| #3 | Julia Alina🌸 | 58% | 78 |
| #4 | Majzs | 57% | 211 |
| #5 | Extnat ⛟ | 55% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Julia Alina🌸 | 58% | 78 |
| #4 | Majzs | 57% | 211 |
| #5 | Extnat ⛟ | 55% | 104 |
| #6 | S4NDA | 53% | 30 |
| #7 | Acozin☃ (个_个) | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Extnat ⛟ | 9 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | 5 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Acozin☃ (个_个) | 4 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | Majzs | 1 | 0.0002 |
| #5 | S4NDA | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Majzs | 416 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #2 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | 346 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #3 | Julia Alina🌸 | 213 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | Extnat ⛟ | 150 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | Acozin☃ (个_个) | 94 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tjorben | +4.26 | 88 | 60 |
| #2 | Extnat ⛟ | +1.78 | 85 | 49 |
| #3 | Julia Alina🌸 | +1.09 | 81 | 58 |
| #4 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | +1.08 | 75 | 81 |
| #5 | Acozin☃ (个_个) | -1.32 | 40 | 61 |





