








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 399 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 93 matches | 1,472 | |
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
879 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,796 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 427 | 11% |
| Smokes | 1081 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 991 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1297 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $769,992 of utility $236 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 170 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | L1meXX | 49% | 45 |
| #11 | pågarnaisöder | 45% | 22 |
| #12 | yock | 44% | 32 |
| #13 | ✪ mtrL ✪ -:- | 38% | 8 |
| #14 | Prince Libbe | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Proomic | 2 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Tjorben | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | 324 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #2 | blu'e | Esportal.com | 101 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #3 | L1meXX | 86 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Tjorben | 79 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | HaXsson | 62 | 0.31 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TERA | +5.73 | 83 | 52 |
| #2 | Tjorben | +5.48 | 87 | 66 |
| #3 | Tjorben & Thorsen was here mos m | +3.55 | 70 | 82 |
| #4 | HaXsson | +3.13 | 56 | 76 |
| #5 | yock | +3.00 | 69 | 60 |





