








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 292 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 19 matches | ||
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2806 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,202 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1914 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2620 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1180 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1488 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $726,378 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 341 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RescueToasts | 73% | 26 |
| #2 | boof pack asian | 63% | 146 |
| #3 | Allah is Lord | 63% | 231 |
| #4 | TeenyTynz | 60% | 151 |
| #5 | ◣ ◢ | 59% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | TeenyTynz | 60% | 151 |
| #5 | ◣ ◢ | 59% | 110 |
| #6 | alex42-iwnl- | 57% | 23 |
| #7 | CrescentElite | 56% | 39 |
| #8 | KKØNNCOD | 55% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Allah is Lord | 79 | 0.0177 |
| #2 | TeenyTynz | 17 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | boof pack asian | 13 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | ◣ ◢ | 9 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | KKØNNCOD | 6 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Allah is Lord | 631 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #2 | ◣ ◢ | 217 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | TeenyTynz | 166 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | CrescentElite | 105 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | boof pack asian | 80 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ◣ ◢ | +4.58 | 89 | 43 |
| #2 | Allah is Lord | +3.76 | 83 | 57 |
| #3 | alex42-iwnl- | +3.14 | 70 | 49 |
| #4 | frankie. | +1.84 | 64 | 53 |
| #5 | TeenyTynz | +0.35 | 36 | 33 |





