








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 540 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 183 matches | ||
| Wingman | 86 matches | ||
| Premier | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4584 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,767 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2921 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2535 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3625 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2686 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,309,874 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 438 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aatu | 63% | 88 |
| #2 | MOGE | 61% | 64 |
| #3 | Smokey | 59% | 126 |
| #4 | abe5u^ | 58% | 204 |
| #5 | aimlock pablo | 58% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | abe5u^ | 22 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Oowerpoower | 13 | 0.0171 |
| #3 | Smokey | 9 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | aimlock pablo | 8 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Kitzkatz | 5 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | abe5u^ | 1111 | 0.24 | 33 min |
| #2 | aatu | 494 | 0.25 | 11 min |
| #3 | huoleton koiramummi | 430 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #4 | aimlock pablo | 349 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #5 | Smokey | 329 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | スブラ | +2.62 | 87 | 64 |
| #2 | aimlock pablo | +2.16 | 71 | 67 |
| #3 | Smokey | +1.87 | 87 | 65 |
| #4 | abe5u^ | +1.78 | 73 | 75 |
| #5 | uGGo.. | +0.61 | 70 | 49 |





