










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 140 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2231 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,459 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1089 | 24% |
| Smokes | 953 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1376 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1041 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,243,666 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harpy XV | 58% | 55 |
| #2 | felix | 48% | 132 |
| #3 | Douganater | 47% | 60 |
| #4 | TPK | 44% | 25 |
| #5 | Pleeb | 43% | 266 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pleeb | 450 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #2 | ji₥ | 417 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #3 | SketchXo | 144 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | Harpy XV | 144 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | felix | 125 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Harpy XV | +7.88 | 83 | 74 |
| #2 | ji₥ | +5.42 | 84 | 68 |
| #3 | SketchXo | +4.22 | 82 | 57 |
| #4 | TPK | -0.66 | 35 | 61 |
| #5 | Douganater | -0.94 | 38 | 28 |





