








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 54 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 108 matches | ||
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2205 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,477 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4136 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3365 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2433 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2543 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $323,647 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 244 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Arnulfo | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | ^ N u i # . _ | 67% | 15 |
| #3 | Tasharel | 67% | 18 |
| #4 | sL.x | 65% | 23 |
| #5 | neoN ⛴ | 64% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Jörn ⛟ | 54% | 35 |
| #12 | FANATIQZ; | 53% | 17 |
| #13 | Adze | 50% | 20 |
| #14 | dmX | 40% | 15 |
| #15 | rico | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Saiyajin HomerLadiesMan | +2.59 | 88 | 57 |
| #2 | Jörn ⛟ | +1.99 | 79 | 64 |
| #3 | MiruD | +0.95 | 57 | 78 |
| #4 | neoN ⛴ | +0.85 | 71 | 78 |
| #5 | TPS | +0.78 | 68 | 80 |





