










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 68 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
292 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,084 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 337 | 31% |
| Smokes | 342 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 182 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 223 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $76,627 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beavis- | 72% | 18 |
| #2 | kreaz | 50% | 2 |
| #3 | Dytor62 | 50% | 6 |
| #4 | realzen | 48% | 23 |
| #5 | PR | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Dytor62 | 50% | 6 |
| #4 | realzen | 48% | 23 |
| #5 | PR | 40% | 5 |
| #6 | M0nesy | 0% | 2 |
| #7 | M1key | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Beavis- | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | realzen | 107 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #2 | Beavis- | 56 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | M0nesy | 20 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | PR | 11 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | Dytor62 | 10 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | forsyy | +3.59 | 96 | 62 |
| #2 | M0nesy | +2.13 | 94 | 47 |
| #3 | realzen | +0.92 | 87 | 66 |
| #4 | PR | +0.77 | 96 | 58 |
| #5 | Dytor62 | -0.17 | 95 | 43 |





