








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 387 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 30 matches | ||
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2506 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,063 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2596 | 37% |
| Smokes | 945 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 2016 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1506 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,232,439 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 29 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Nash | 45% | 22 |
| #9 | NeuTroNBZh | 41% | 41 |
| #10 | ✘𝓢𝓽𝓮𝓮𝓵𝓴𝓪✘ | 39% | 38 |
| #11 | Sennar2048 | 38% | 32 |
| #12 | l\loXP | 37% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | l\loXP | 19 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | AHNO | 13 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Noname | 10 | 0.0103 |
| #4 | SLIDER | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Nash | 5 | 0.0113 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AHNO | 748 | 0.23 | 21 min |
| #2 | SLIDER | 515 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #3 | l\loXP | 274 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #4 | ✘𝓢𝓽𝓮𝓮𝓵𝓴𝓪✘ | 193 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #5 | Ghosttt | 130 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AHNO | +5.43 | 76 | 73 |
| #2 | Maître Renard | +3.37 | 64 | 53 |
| #3 | NeuTroNBZh | +2.11 | 67 | 56 |
| #4 | Nash | +2.02 | 68 | 69 |
| #5 | ✘𝓢𝓽𝓮𝓮𝓵𝓴𝓪✘ | +1.81 | 69 | 67 |





