








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 135 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 92 matches | ||
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2371 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,630 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2810 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2978 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1544 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2298 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $649,860 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dogg27 #TRUMP2024 | 8 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Madbeetle | 4 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Joscf | 3 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | ionic | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | Trickyvic99 | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dogg27 #TRUMP2024 | 372 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #2 | ionic | 150 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | Madbeetle | 121 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | D'Leto | 120 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | Aroh | 119 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ionic | +1.94 | 86 | 65 |
| #2 | ustick | +1.25 | 80 | 64 |
| #3 | j4son | +1.17 | 78 | 60 |
| #4 | Dogg27 #TRUMP2024 | +1.05 | 71 | 59 |
| #5 | forest | +0.56 | 68 | 68 |





