








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 200 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 364 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2324 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,733 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2649 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2207 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 3745 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 3132 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,247,516 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Player45136 | 60% | 117 |
| #2 | PiraT | 52% | 152 |
| #3 | Bolec | 51% | 240 |
| #4 | BajcepsPumpa | 51% | 289 |
| #5 | ifryt | 50% | 307 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | PiraT | 52% | 152 |
| #3 | Bolec | 51% | 240 |
| #4 | BajcepsPumpa | 51% | 289 |
| #5 | ifryt | 50% | 307 |
| #6 | Robson | 44% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bolec | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | BajcepsPumpa | 8 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | ifryt | 7 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | PiraT | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Player45136 | 6 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bolec | 675 | 0.14 | 24 min |
| #2 | ifryt | 605 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| #3 | PiraT | 381 | 0.13 | 11 min |
| #4 | Robson | 255 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #5 | BajcepsPumpa | 247 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PiraT | +2.65 | 80 | 67 |
| #2 | Player45136 | +2.51 | 74 | 53 |
| #3 | BajcepsPumpa | +2.21 | 69 | 55 |
| #4 | Bolec | +0.67 | 40 | 80 |
| #5 | Robson | -1.58 | 21 | 59 |





