








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 952 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 557 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5496 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,172 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5812 | 20% |
| Smokes | 11591 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 6323 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5446 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,399,241 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 903 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yousef | 52% | 52 |
| #2 | Phillip K. Dog | 50% | 181 |
| #3 | yingling | 50% | 207 |
| #4 | MrTrashMan | 49% | 122 |
| #5 | Lehnburger | 45% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrTrashMan | 7 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | yingling | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | 4klift opr8r | 4 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Phillip K. Dog | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | jimin stan | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phillip K. Dog | 762 | 0.20 | 20 min |
| #2 | God's Only SOn | 372 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| #3 | jimin stan | 311 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #4 | Lehnburger | 274 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #5 | adPEXtwinDoNG | 268 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jimin stan | +3.14 | 69 | 61 |
| #2 | Phillip K. Dog | +1.96 | 76 | 77 |
| #3 | MrTrashMan | +1.15 | 68 | 58 |
| #4 | adPEXtwinDoNG | +0.92 | 57 | 65 |
| #5 | Yousef | +0.23 | 56 | 38 |





