








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 114 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 137 matches | ||
| Wingman | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2197 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,758 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2767 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2338 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2511 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2142 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $775,263 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fixi.MaK | 60% | 25 |
| #2 | Mr.T | 54% | 28 |
| #3 | Maksik1ng | 53% | 17 |
| #4 | Finn ist scheiße | 49% | 232 |
| #5 | HaseAufSpeed | 47% | 86 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Mr.T | 54% | 28 |
| #3 | Maksik1ng | 53% | 17 |
| #4 | Finn ist scheiße | 49% | 232 |
| #5 | HaseAufSpeed | 47% | 86 |
| #6 | ILSN | 43% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Finn ist scheiße | 22 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | HaseAufSpeed | 9 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | ILSN | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Fixi.MaK | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Mr.T | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Finn ist scheiße | 490 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #2 | HaseAufSpeed | 133 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #3 | Fixi.MaK | 99 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | Mr.T | 59 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | ILSN | 44 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Finn ist scheiße | +3.35 | 87 | 56 |
| #2 | Fixi.MaK | +2.40 | 84 | 66 |
| #3 | Mr.T | +2.17 | 94 | 54 |
| #4 | ILSN | +1.44 | 79 | 49 |
| #5 | HaseAufSpeed | -1.07 | 74 | 56 |





