








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 315 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 232 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 179 matches | ||
| Premier | 143 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 112 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 233 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6569 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,505 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4832 | 16% |
| Smokes | 7991 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 11191 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 6491 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,713,896 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 791 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slayest Guys | 62% | 73 |
| #2 | Fragon | 54% | 373 |
| #3 | Hop | 52% | 88 |
| #4 | Greta Thunberg | 52% | 67 |
| #5 | Wh1z | 52% | 481 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wh1z | 78 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | Nathe | 62 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | bebegrill | 40 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | Fragon | 22 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | cyx | 20 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nathe | 1335 | 0.13 | 32 min |
| #2 | Fragon | 1281 | 0.18 | 36 min |
| #3 | Wh1z | 712 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #4 | cyx | 564 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #5 | Hop | 311 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ajaws1 | +3.83 | 80 | 57 |
| #2 | Fragon | +3.70 | 84 | 69 |
| #3 | Slayest Guys | +3.00 | 69 | 41 |
| #4 | Hop | +2.04 | 90 | 72 |
| #5 | Nathe | +1.97 | 65 | 59 |





