








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1679 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 222 matches | ||
| Faceit | 152 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




75 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9070 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,263 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13578 | 37% |
| Smokes | 9828 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6114 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 6743 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,093,423 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 246 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hud | 51 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | medicine seller | 36 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | Daddy Long DIck | 23 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | TacoTuesdayFan | 17 | 0.0088 |
| #5 | Ryan | 7 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hud | 1388 | 0.18 | 37 min |
| #2 | medicine seller | 713 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #3 | Waitingkill H20 | 687 | 0.18 | 16 min |
| #4 | TIMMAH ♿ | 451 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #5 | Daddy Long DIck | 429 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hud | +3.73 | 76 | 63 |
| #2 | Dasko | +1.70 | 64 | 67 |
| #3 | ocodile | +1.09 | 81 | 46 |
| #4 | TIMMAH ♿ | +0.87 | 83 | 67 |
| #5 | medicine seller | +0.20 | 60 | 50 |





