








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 73 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 151 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2315 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,267 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2337 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2171 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1745 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2014 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $351,379 of utility $70 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KarmoS | 56% | 63 |
| #2 | Vikatimees | 54% | 69 |
| #3 | BugsBunny_ | 50% | 52 |
| #4 | marx | 49% | 121 |
| #5 | Haisuloom | 46% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | TOOOBIAKI | 41% | 34 |
| #8 | Rsms | 40% | 42 |
| #9 | sõll♿ | 39% | 66 |
| #10 | T | 36% | 33 |
| #11 | AJAR NJRT | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | marx | 24 | 0.0098 |
| #2 | Prostoloog | 11 | 0.0139 |
| #3 | Vikatimees | 9 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | sõll♿ | 7 | 0.0051 |
| #5 | TOOOBIAKI | 6 | 0.0083 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | marx | 713 | 0.29 | 17 min |
| #2 | Vikatimees | 189 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | TOOOBIAKI | 157 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #4 | Haisuloom | 122 | 0.49 | 2 min |
| #5 | sõll♿ | 88 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KarmoS | +3.55 | 75 | 57 |
| #2 | marx | +2.61 | 90 | 58 |
| #3 | Vikatimees | +1.60 | 58 | 62 |
| #4 | TOOOBIAKI | +0.40 | 80 | 59 |
| #5 | LakuLehma | -0.50 | 73 | 63 |





