








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 183 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 213 matches | ||
| Faceit | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2650 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,262 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3304 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4007 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1271 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 2680 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,212,270 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 338 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tito | 53% | 166 |
| #2 | Gen the King of UwU | 51% | 167 |
| #3 | ✪ StevieJV | 48% | 46 |
| #4 | Jeapr | 48% | 90 |
| #5 | Goblin Mode | 48% | 201 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Goblin Mode | 48% | 201 |
| #6 | ✪ TheViolentSushi | 47% | 134 |
| #7 | manny | 42% | 19 |
| #8 | LaFlame | 35% | 62 |
| #9 | illwill | 32% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goblin Mode | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Gen the King of UwU | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | tito | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Jeapr | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | ✪ TheViolentSushi | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goblin Mode | 794 | 0.18 | 21 min |
| #2 | Gen the King of UwU | 764 | 0.22 | 20 min |
| #3 | tito | 650 | 0.18 | 18 min |
| #4 | ✪ TheViolentSushi | 508 | 0.18 | 11 min |
| #5 | Jeapr | 194 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tito | +1.70 | 75 | 69 |
| #2 | ✪ StevieJV | +0.78 | 60 | 57 |
| #3 | illwill | +0.47 | 63 | 68 |
| #4 | Gen the King of UwU | +0.43 | 75 | 69 |
| #5 | manny | +0.26 | 63 | 78 |





