








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 355 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 598 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4059 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,239 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3546 | 16% |
| Smokes | 5764 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6703 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 6226 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,923,056 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rahim Asaf | 54% | 168 |
| #2 | Gustavo FRizz | 51% | 441 |
| #3 | Hugo Boss | 51% | 627 |
| #4 | N3xxoR | 50% | 193 |
| #5 | The Buday | 49% | 162 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Hugo Boss | 51% | 627 |
| #4 | N3xxoR | 50% | 193 |
| #5 | The Buday | 49% | 162 |
| #6 | Abra Kebabra | 46% | 39 |
| #7 | Vespi | 42% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hugo Boss | 35 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | Gustavo FRizz | 14 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | N3xxoR | 11 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Rahim Asaf | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Vespi | 5 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N3xxoR | 542 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #2 | The Buday | 465 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #3 | Hugo Boss | 393 | 0.03 | 12 min |
| #4 | Gustavo FRizz | 352 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #5 | Rahim Asaf | 263 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hugo Boss | +2.45 | 65 | 47 |
| #2 | N3xxoR | +1.17 | 75 | 66 |
| #3 | Rahim Asaf | -0.55 | 61 | 57 |
| #4 | The Buday | -0.58 | 33 | 79 |
| #5 | Gustavo FRizz | -0.93 | 50 | 48 |





