








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1268 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1783 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 37 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




68 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
19834 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,095 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4250 | 12% |
| Smokes | 8724 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 16572 | 46% |
| Molotovs | 6549 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $9,073,926 of utility $227 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 495 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N3xxoR | 51% | 587 |
| #2 | Gustavo FRizz | 51% | 1118 |
| #3 | Bombardino Crocodilo | 51% | 627 |
| #4 | The Buday | 50% | 428 |
| #5 | Rahim Asaf | 50% | 373 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Bombardino Crocodilo | 51% | 627 |
| #4 | The Buday | 50% | 428 |
| #5 | Rahim Asaf | 50% | 373 |
| #6 | Vespi | 47% | 116 |
| #7 | Abra Kebabra | 46% | 161 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N3xxoR | 40 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Gustavo FRizz | 28 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | Bombardino Crocodilo | 28 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | The Buday | 18 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Rahim Asaf | 14 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N3xxoR | 1640 | 0.13 | 46 min |
| #2 | The Buday | 1319 | 0.14 | 48 min |
| #3 | Gustavo FRizz | 1019 | 0.04 | 21 min |
| #4 | Bombardino Crocodilo | 695 | 0.05 | 13 min |
| #5 | Rahim Asaf | 690 | 0.09 | 19 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hugo Boss | +1.88 | 64 | 47 |
| #2 | N3xxoR | +0.81 | 73 | 65 |
| #3 | The Buday | -0.95 | 32 | 76 |
| #4 | Gustavo FRizz | -0.99 | 52 | 46 |
| #5 | Rahim Asaf | -1.04 | 58 | 56 |





