








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 518 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Esplay | 3 matches | 2,309 | |
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2114 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,424 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1564 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1340 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1431 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1089 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $475,791 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 317 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nasse | 100% | 10 |
| #2 | kaluallu | 89% | 9 |
| #3 | :|) | 88% | 25 |
| #4 | S1rva | 82% | 17 |
| #5 | ville1 | 76% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sammee | 7 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | vauhtisami | 6 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | S1rva | 3 | 0.0080 |
| #4 | wilper | 3 | 0.0112 |
| #5 | ville1 | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sammee | 171 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #2 | ville1 | 96 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | :|) | 94 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #4 | vauhtisami | 83 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | 예지 | 81 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :|) | +4.94 | 91 | 93 |
| #2 | mark | +3.16 | 68 | 70 |
| #3 | kaluallu | +2.95 | 87 | 71 |
| #4 | ake | +2.61 | 89 | 64 |
| #5 | nasse | +2.42 | 86 | 70 |





