








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 9 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
506 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 974 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 363 | 37% |
| Smokes | 59 | 6% |
| HE Grenades | 303 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 249 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $61,161 of utility $52 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xFlound4r | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | mikebee | 60% | 5 |
| #3 | xFlound3r | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | XxReaper454xX | 46% | 26 |
| #5 | +2 | 46% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The one who Knocks | 7 | 0.0116 |
| #2 | Schindyy | 7 | 0.0169 |
| #3 | +2 | 6 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | XxReaper454xX | 1 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Zakinater | 1 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | +2 | 227 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #2 | The one who Knocks | 125 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #3 | XxReaper454xX | 72 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | Schindyy | 45 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Zakinater | 15 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | +2 | +6.27 | 79 | 60 |
| #2 | mikebee | +2.86 | 84 | 39 |
| #3 | The one who Knocks | +1.32 | 43 | 39 |
| #4 | xFlound3r | +0.53 | 57 | 16 |
| #5 | I'm on 12 Vicodin | -0.14 | 34 | 41 |





