








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 92 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
878 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,820 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 486 | 27% |
| Smokes | 613 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 350 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 371 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $458,997 of utility $251 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 54 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Space dude51 | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | greg | 83% | 6 |
| #3 | skill free player | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | trav | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | iltemnc | 62% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Jaguar | 57% | 14 |
| #8 | yung d4nny- | 57% | 53 |
| #9 | gunny | 56% | 43 |
| #10 | Longbow | 56% | 27 |
| #11 | stellar | 51% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yung d4nny- | 182 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | gunny | 125 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | stellar | 123 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | Longbow | 69 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | iltemnc | 59 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skill free player | +3.06 | 90 | 74 |
| #2 | yung d4nny- | +2.99 | 81 | 75 |
| #3 | trav | +2.17 | 76 | 61 |
| #4 | greg | +1.74 | 58 | 44 |
| #5 | gunny | +0.97 | 73 | 70 |





