








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 922 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Overpass | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 44 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




57 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6988 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,608 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4288 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4387 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4850 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4083 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,357,800 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 718 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Space dude51 | 68% | 37 |
| #2 | Jaguar | 59% | 39 |
| #3 | trav | 58% | 113 |
| #4 | iltemnc | 57% | 104 |
| #5 | chris | 57% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | greg | 49 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | Longbow | 24 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | trav | 14 | 0.0062 |
| #4 | T. Howard's Grand Unified Theory | 10 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | iltemnc | 9 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Longbow | 831 | 0.14 | 22 min |
| #2 | greg | 758 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #3 | trav | 279 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | gunny | 273 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | iltemnc | 225 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yung d4nny- | +5.07 | 87 | 69 |
| #2 | trav | +1.29 | 75 | 58 |
| #3 | gunny | +1.28 | 73 | 66 |
| #4 | iltemnc | +1.21 | 75 | 68 |
| #5 | Space dude51 | +1.05 | 60 | 63 |





