








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 650 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 314 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3717 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,275 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1636 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2364 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2954 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2321 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,030,677 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 32 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ‹Cyŋą☻› | 71% | 38 |
| #2 | Cadaveri | 54% | 50 |
| #3 | M1xu | 53% | 107 |
| #4 | ★Krys | 52% | 25 |
| #5 | veljaN | 49% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | M1xu | 53% | 107 |
| #4 | ★Krys | 52% | 25 |
| #5 | veljaN | 49% | 39 |
| #6 | c̶o̶c̶o̶♡ | 32% | 34 |
| #7 | CraX | 25% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1xu | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | c̶o̶c̶o̶♡ | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | ★Krys | 3 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | veljaN | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1xu | 322 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | veljaN | 161 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #3 | ★Krys | 101 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #4 | ‹Cyŋą☻› | 97 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | CraX | 90 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M1xu | +2.06 | 81 | 66 |
| #2 | ✪ JamBo^_^ | +1.76 | 80 | 55 |
| #3 | veljaN | +0.73 | 66 | 83 |
| #4 | ‹Cyŋą☻› | +0.56 | 74 | 77 |
| #5 | Cadaveri | -0.22 | 62 | 66 |





