








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1554 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 832 matches | ||
| Faceit | 203 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 78 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




46 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12544 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 45,495 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 15183 | 33% |
| Smokes | 9135 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 13037 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 8140 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,495,620 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3426 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prakM | 66% | 150 |
| #2 | 5th dan blackbelt driller | 65% | 185 |
| #3 | riveR<3 | 63% | 63 |
| #4 | genesis | 63% | 552 |
| #5 | gunnlock[f] | 63% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | genesis | 29 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | jourdain | 21 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | arofe | 19 | 0.0067 |
| #4 | prakM | 16 | 0.0052 |
| #5 | 5th dan blackbelt driller | 9 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jourdain | 3472 | 0.24 | 96 min |
| #2 | genesis | 1537 | 0.13 | 35 min |
| #3 | mv zquence ¬-¬ * adonix | 529 | 0.27 | 16 min |
| #4 | arofe | 500 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #5 | 5th dan blackbelt driller | 396 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prakM | +2.86 | 83 | 57 |
| #2 | genesis | +2.82 | 95 | 59 |
| #3 | mmr philantrophist | +2.02 | 73 | 73 |
| #4 | 5th dan blackbelt driller | +1.61 | 84 | 59 |
| #5 | warrior | +1.38 | 85 | 65 |





