








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1667 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,734 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2632 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2729 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 894 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 1479 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $781,688 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 13 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | zaza strip | 41% | 112 |
| #7 | Аберама Голд | 41% | 27 |
| #8 | Билли Бой | 40% | 89 |
| #9 | Salmon Salamon, Fish King | 35% | 93 |
| #10 | Natasha Volkova | 26% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Билли Бой | +4.64 | 80 | 63 |
| #2 | zaza strip | +4.19 | 79 | 67 |
| #3 | Отец Джон Хьюз | +2.37 | 73 | 66 |
| #4 | mirzamagomedov | +2.08 | 79 | 60 |
| #5 | Rozā brilles | -1.11 | 37 | 55 |





